Sunday, January 31, 2010

Dear IU: How to pick a Snow Day

Indiana weather is insane. And I mean that with every love filled cell in my body. But since my last post about snow, I have come to the conclusion that snow is on of those things that Indiana wishes it didn't have, so they are going to ignore it and pretend it actually is, uhh, florida. Given this ignore-tendency, we need a non objective way of deciding where the thin line between snow day, and unintentional slip-n-slide is. I have come up with 10 scenarios where a snow day is the right way to go.

1) When the first decision of your day is "Should I risk slipping on that ice sheet, or walk through that ankle deep ice cold water puddle?"
2) While crossing the road, you wonder whether the two head lights that are about half a mile away are two headlights on two motorbikes, or an 18 wheeler truck.
3) When it looks like the world is about to be run over by snow men, much like the vampire-robot-things in I, Robot.
4) When the town turns into the inside of a snow globe.
5) When students turn up to class hopping, limping, with sneezy runny noses, and soaked boots, and all people ask is "So, fell down huh?"
6) When people wonder whether class is cancelled because of weather, DESPITE having full knowledge of IU's non-snow day policy.
7) When it's snowing so bad that people accumulate 2 inches of snow on their head just walking from their doors to their cars.
8) When the words "SIGNIFICANT AMOUNTS OF SNOW/SLEET/ICE ARE EXPECTED OR OCCURRING. THIS WILL MAKE TRAVEL VERY HAZARDOUS OR IMPOSSIBLE." come up in routine conversation.
9) When so many many MANY other colleges shut down because of similar conditions.
And lastly,
10) Whenever I have more than one test/HW/assignment due in a day, and there is at least an inch of snow on the ground. See, I'm not unreasonable :) .

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